Monday, September 10, 2012

I AM Small, I AM Nothing, I AM Nobody

I have a little confession to make, nothing too exciting, most likely
over the top ordinary & boring, yet I'm going to put it out there,
well, for the sake of this post. ;)
I constantly struggle with letting everyone and everything but me define my worth!
Please tell me I'm not the only one!
Have you ever done that? I mean, I don't purposely tell myself, "Ok today, you 
are worth 17 cents, because this person didnt pay attention to you..." or 
"today you are worth $15 bucks because you got a great compliment!"
but nevertheless, I do it in my own little way.

I let my circumstances, comparisons, and the way people treat me...
(even if they don't even mean anything by it or realize they did it)
define how I feel about myself. And I realize that is SO wrong for SO many reasons.
But we all do it at times I think. We let the fact that we live paycheck to paycheck,
or that our ex-boyfriend crushed us, or that we had an abusive childhood,
or maybe that some super amazing blogger didn't respond to us...
suddenly make us feel sort of "unworthy."
Unworthy of what? Unworthy of life? Because that's just silly, isn't it?
Yet, I struggle with this, I swear, daily!
I get this overwhelming feeling of "small." I'm just this small person, 
not worth someone else's precious time or I dont have the big bucks to do certain
things I would love to do, so life must immediately be chalked up as boring or mundane.
That's not true.
There are only TWO things that can determine your value:
YOU and GOD!
Well, God created you with intent and purpose. 
Have you ever created something you love...
and were so proud of your work ....and then just trashed it?
No! You created it for a reason and you love your work.
It's easy to see what God thinks of us and how much value he places
 on our lives if you just look...
" She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far Above Rubies or pearls."
(prov. 31:10)

Bur for some reason, we don't want to believe that.
We are the ONLY other person that can determine our worth.
We can believe what we want to about ourselves!
And not only that, but every experience, sadness, rejection, hurt is only a
jumping off point to help others and speak value & truth into THEIR lives!
Do you realize that?!
EVERY SINGLE hard time you have been through..
have you been through a miscarriage, have you been broken up with,
have people talked bad about you, have you felt neglected or ignored,
have you struggled with money, have you lost your job,
have you not done as well in school as you would have liked, have you felt lost in which direction to take for your life, have your children got into trouble...
whatever it is that has got you down...take those experiences...
and instead of letting those things eat away at your worth, use them, grow from them,
and encourage others who are going through the same things.
Personally I think the highest value is on those who've helped others.
Those who have been through all kinds of crap in life, but refuse to let the "crap" define them...
and instead they love others. They are an encouragement to others!
And if you use those hard experiences, those rejections as a jumping off point
to be a HUGE blessing to another person, then YOUR VALUE is far above 
what you could ever dream! Especially in the eyes of the person whose life
you spoke into. Trust me.
Even this post, is me, taking those bad thoughts about myself, those worthless 
thoughts, those down and out, guess I'm nobody type thoughts that try to 
bombard my mind...and I'm turning them around to encourage YOU to 
do the same thing. You get what I'm saying??
There is PRICELESS TREASURE right there, in You!
Even though I have struggled with this throughout my life, 
I refuse to let myself be valued in the eyes of another.. or in the eyes of what "I think"
another is saying. My heart is to LOVE ON PEOPLE,
and make sure they know how precious they are!!

Congrats to Kim D who won the Messy. Dirty. Hair. Giveaway. 
Email me asap!!


Gillian @ Money After Graduation said...

Great post. It's true, people put too much into what other people think or say about them. It's important to know for yourself how valuable you are.

Christine T said...

so true! and I like the pictures too. I actually just saw something that said something along the lines of: don't go looking for magic because the magic is in side of you- and it was a picture of a fairy!:)
Hope you can please Check out my new post too! Just posted it a few hours ago! :D Let me know what you think!

God bless,

Anonymous said...

We definitely all do this at times! I think the obstacle, at least to me, is that we don't even know we are doing that to ourselves sometimes until we are really crushed. At least we can learn to pick ourselves back up, though!

The Pink Growl said...

OH girl I needed to hear this! I struggle with this daily - probably multiple times daily. I have even made a conscious effort to work on this, but it's been a real trial for me. It's good to know that I'm not the only one (even though that sounds horrible) and I love that verse. I'm putting it in my phone so I can look at it when I need to see it. Thanks Julie!

Kimberly said...

I get it. It's a struggle. Sometimes I'm uber confident & then other days I'm unsure about everything.

stephanie said...

oh gosh. i think we all deal with this!!! i know i sure do
; ) great post!!

LWLH said...

I think we all do this on some level. I try to think I don't but I truly do care what people think.

Erin said...

So so true. I love your honest, passionate way of speaking truth in such a down-to-earth way that I can so relate to. Just love you and those pictures are gorge!

Michelle said...

Wow. Thank you SO much for posting this. I struggle with this so often. I was just talking with my friend the other night crying my eyes out about feeling the very things you described. Letting those who have broke my heart make me feel like dirt. Letting those who are more athletic or smarter or pretty, etc. make me feel small and insignificant. It is so dumb! We have an almighty God who loves us unconditionally and I really need to focus on that more often!!!

Jana Faith said...

Wow. Thanks for being encouraging. I shared this on my facebook because it's a great reminder we all need to read. Thank you for reminding my stories & experiences are important. They all make up my testimony. I can choose to let it glorify God.

Joanna said...

love it! love you spuls, your writing is very talented and inspirational!

Hannah Hurley said...

Lovely...just lovely. I used to always draw a picture in my journal of a heaping pile of junk with a garden growing out of it because that is how I felt with God. He makes me beautiful despite what I actually am made up of. I struggled with the need for recognition, of being validated. Thank you for sharing this and know that you are not alone! I admire you much and look forward to your posts. I just want to let you know that you are a great blogger and I really cherish your words and videos (my fav). Have a blessed week and I hope you will feel like glistening rubies :)
Hannah @Hurley Love

Salena Lee said...

amazing post, loved it and your photos.

Magical Day Dream said...

So true. We shouldn't ever hold value in external things, because they mean nothing. We are valuable because God made us. Period. We don't even need to do anything to 'deserve his love'. I can sometimes struggle with that last one as well, feeling like I need to 'please God'. It's a process. I grow and am already more confident than I used to be a couple of years ago :)



Janna Renee said...

This is exactly why I do the "Perception Is Everything" Series! Everyone needs to not worry about their "worth", but worry about whether they are allowing their life to be worth living! You are an inspiration to us all, so you better not think you are nothing!!

the hollie rogue said...

right on sister. thanks for the encouragement (awkward side hug)


Designed with ♥ by Nudge Media Design