Tuesday, June 12, 2012

your garbage. your heart.

I'm never really too afraid to be as real as possible on here.
I have apprehensive moments, what if moments...
what will people think moments..
but in the end, I've found people like REAL people 
and can relate to REAL people... I know I always do.
I always gain inspiration and wisdom when someone is speaking from "experience"...
knowing that I am not alone in what I've been through.
Nobody is. Although it may feel like it, You are not.
So, I'm going to reveal something "almost" embarrassing about me.
When I was going through my emotional crisis to put it mildly, 
at that time, because of poor choices...and withdrawal from everyone and everything
that could possibly help me, I never thought or go to God for help.
Finally admitting to myself though, that I did need help, I went to my doctor...
cried my eyes out, poured my thoughts out...
my obsessive, over thought, can't let things go thoughts...
He basically came to the conclusion that I was obsessive/compulsive.
No, I don't go around turning on lights switches 12 times before I leave the house,
or wiping down doorknobs before I touch them.
It's more of a thought process with me.
When something bothers me, hurts me, annoys me... I dwell on it.
I obsess and obsess and obsess...
And with that said, It is mostly always on something negative~
While some of it is informative, yes... it's always something
A) hurtful to me
B) gossip about someone else
C) something disgusting
 D) some sort of complaining & whining
 E) a bad report of some kind
always negative.. ALWAYS something I do NOT want to dwell on.
Because it BOTHERS me to no end and eats away at my thoughts all day or week long.
Whether its the pink slime that makes up McDonalds chicken nuggets,
whether its talk radio arguing and whining about some politician,
whether its some local bad news report or an article or youtube video about some preacher that is
being spread as gossip information, slandering people and their mistakes...
negative negative negative...
Informative, yes. Negative... ALWAYS...
(And while I am on the topic, just because something may be true,
doesn't make it NOT gossip, and NOT hurtful to people, people whom God loves.)

And who needs that?! My ears (and eyes) are not garbage cans.
Sometimes, in order to walk in love, I actually have to shut myself off from
what people are saying... or "sharing"... because my heart is simple.
It's to love others . This includes both loving the one who made the mistake,
AND loving the one who is spreading the argument or news about dot dot dot....
And if I am to love them, I don't want to think negative things about ANY person.
And the answer is simple, to NOT feed on all the garbage that is available in this world,
but thrive on things that are uplifting to me and to others.
You know the saying, Garbage In, Garbage Out...
Well if you feed on it, that is what is going to come out of you.

And THAT is not what I want. 
I always want to uplift, encourage, & edify.

I never really understood why people want to consume garbage...
In all honesty, I used to! I used to love celebrity gossip. Until I realized how
hurtful and damaging it is to them... Why should I want part in that?
Not only to them, but to myself, because it causes me to
get wrapped up in making assumptions about someone I don't really know.
I'd hate for people to make assumptions about me
(and trust me, I know they have) based on my mistakes...
So why cloud our minds and hearts with garbage about THINGS?
And then not only that, but that is what comes pouring out of us.
Whats weird is a lot of us would rarely do it about someone we love or care for,
but yet we feel we have some right to do it to a stranger.
I get that we need knowledge to make informed choices about politics, etc...
but you can ask my hubby, if he is listening to talk radio, I cannot stand it.
I can't stand the negative whining, even when I believe what is being said...
It's the gossipy, whiny, make fun of or talk about people thing that gets me
all riled up... or the disgusting, tasteless, negative news...
causing people to make assumptions of lives  or topics they have no real clue about.
And I just don't want to obsess over it. I don't want to think on those things.
I just don't. I get irritable and its an easy recipe for a bad day, to be truthful.
So I shut if off, shut my ears, my eyes...whatever I have to do
to not let that garbage in my head...and more importantly, in my heart.
I want what comes out of my mouth and heart to be full of life to those who will listen,
and full of love of those I am speaking of.
Luke 6:45 says  
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, 
 and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. 
For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.

(I even have to catch myself when complaining about my own life at times...
because I've realized, how is that uplifting to anyone else?)

What is stored up in your heart? What are you feeding on?
What are you sharing with others? What is Your mouth speaking?
Phillipians 4:8 
Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, 
whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, 
if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Is what you are feeding on pure? Is it lovely? Commendable?
Is there excellence and praise in it? If not, don't feed on or dwell on it.

I'm a firm believer in God wanting good for us, so when he tells us to do something,
it's for a reason. If he tells us to think on things that are pure,
lovely, commendable... it is for our own good. And for the good of others,
whom in case you didn't realize, he also loves just as much as he loves you.
 If I set my thoughts and affections on all the garbage information
the internet or news or facebook has to share with me,
then I'd be one grumpy person ALL the time.
I'd be obsessing over the negative all the time. AND I'd be feeding it to you.
Probably here on this blog.
And I refuse.
I think the hardest time to not obsess over negative.. 
  is when people hurt YOU specifically.
It's hard to NOT dwell on that, to feel sad, or anger, or frustration...
focusing only on negative.
BUT if you set your affections on things that bring you life,
trust me it get's easier. Set your thoughts on God.

Remember, Garbage In, Garbage Out...
Out of the overflow of the heart, your mouth speaks!
What you fill YOUR life with, YOUR thoughts with...
will emanate from you to your friends, family, kids...

And none of us wants to be a "negative" influence to those around us.


Taylor said...

Well said my friend. I try and live by a motto of surrounding yourself (myself) with those that are positive. Negativity is incredibly toxic. My life is filled with enough drama within my own family (inlaws mainly) and it's hard enough to keep separation and extricate myself from their constant drama. I try. Every single day. Because it just brings me down and stresses me out. And it's over crap. And it's never good. Never a celebration of an accomplishment (and when it is, it's short lived and right back to the drama). I appreciate real people. Thanks for being real and honest.

Helen said...

Beautifully said. I surround myself with positive people. When they aren't available I make sure I'm positive. Life is a journey and I'm going to enjoy it.

Jessica | Jessica Who? said...

great post girl! thank you for this!

p.s. you have a gorgeous family!!

L said...

LOVE this post!!! It just echos everything the Lord has placed on my heart. These last few weeks I have written 4 posts on the power of words and LOVE everything you have written here. In fact I love that it took you one post to say what it took me 4 LOL =)
You are precious girl!
Much Love!

Zia Blue said...

Wonderfully said- I too obsess over things all the time, but have been trying to keep a more zen attitude lately. Good luck!


Allison Coomes said...

Okay...I'm pretty sure we're soul sisters because God has been wrestling with my heart regarding not letting negative behaviors and thoughts of others consume me. I think being a mom is such a great blessing because our littles have such a great way of continually pointing us to the most tender side of life and people.
Thanks for sharing so REAL good stuff!

Kayla said...

Okay so I know I comment on a lot of these, but this really helped me out. You sound JUST. LIKE. ME. I am the exact same way and have been working on everything I do. God is showing me more and more everyday on how to become a better person and not getting involved with all the negative. life is more blessed with out it all. thank you sooo much Julie for making this blog and letting God work through you!! <3 <3 <3

TicoTina said...

I've thought about this numerous times - so glad you wrote it out here! I definitely agree!!!

(and I hope you know I was totally kidding about your dorkitude - wouldn't want you to over analyze it or anything =)

Anonymous said...

this is such an amazing post. we all need reminders such as this. thank you, so beautifully said.

Single Mommy-fied said...

I haven't been diagnosed with it, but I very obviously have OCD. I have to avoid the news as much as possible, especially now that I have kids. I will obsess and over empathize with it and worry about having brought my kids into an awful world. I know the news pieces that will set me off just from the titles so I just stay away from them. I don't feel less informed about the world for not dwelling in the extremism that the news picks up on. This was a beautiful post. I enjoyed it very much.

Maria said...

This was a wonderful and powerful post! Loved your words (and photos), Julie.
One of my friends and I were just talking about how draining it can be to be around negative people, who almost always seem to focus on the bad and not the good.
I think you need to have moments of grief, sadness, heartache in life...but there's a difference between that and being just plain negative.
Beautiful post!
Have a fabulous day!

Sourire11 said...

This was a wonderful post at a perfect time for me. Thank you.

Jamie Horton said...

What a great post, and timely! My heart carries the burden of caring about everyone and everything - and my mind won't let my heart forget "the garbage". I have not followed celebrity gossip in years, I don't watch the news, I try to avoid reading about scandal - It is a lot of negative for a heart to carry!

Have a great rest of your week!

Joy Foucault said...

I always love reading your postings Julie! They always are so real and honest. I try to do that as well on my own blog, and generally can get me in trouble It encourages me that we are like minded in that. As always linking scripture to life. Something I always need to hear and be reminded of. Negativity breads discontent in my heart in a variety of ways. Thanks for the check.

Kelly said...

PERFECT reminder. PERFECT my friend. I've had to change my WHOLE outlook over the years. It's a CHOICE every day to dwell on the lovely, noble & good and NOT the ugly & negative. BUT, THAT choice is one of the most important ones we make each day and it is SO worth it.

Rachel said...

What a great post! (And beautiful photos!) I know exactly what you mean. I find it so hard not to dwell on negative thoughts as well. A lot of nights I lose what precious little sleep I get anymore because I wake up in a panic wondering if I'm doing the right things for Lillian, or how I can be a better mom, etc. Then I try to just pray for guidance and peace.

Nicole Cintron said...

Phillipians 4:8
Janny Grein would sing these words ministering to us during her and her husbands visits to FCCF.

ms.composure said...

Stumbled onto your blog and just wanted to leave you a little blog luv! Def enjoyed this post!! New Follower via email :-)

Roopa Iyer said...

It is absolutely wonderful/amazing how when we truly need things the most, they appear. I absolutely needed to read this today! I mean, nowadays, you come home so tired with the day, not because it was busy, but with all the baggage that occurred- what you've heard, what you've seen, and what you've read. I am truly striving to try and just block it out. Beautiful post! You have a new supporter, definitely!

Thanks so much
-Roopa Iyer

Anonymous said...

you hit the nail on the head! perfectly worded and the struggle I have all the time, trying to remember this, as i am such an oversensitive person to all of the gossipy, hurt, hard things to remember to seek good, and seek God. Thanks Julie. :)

:) Barbie

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